Uh, oh...this is not good.

Let me tell you about my feet.

No, nothing like that; nothing nasty or gross. Just that my feet are killing me on a daily basis now. Or, rather, just my right foot.

In addition to the FMS, I also have RA. The RA is what I'm having trouble with now, in addition to the crap that FMS puts me through (can we say three hour naps?).

The makers of Tylenol will probably make a mint off me alone, I buy so much of their products.

Unfortunately, it doesn't seem to help the RA that is slowly and painfully taking over my right foot, especially if I have to stand for long periods of time, like I did the other night. Not only was I in a great deal of pain, but then both my feet cramped up on me to the point where I thought I was going to have to call someone to get me and drag me into class. Literally drag...

The last time I worked my security job, my right foot was hurting so much that I could barely put enough pressure on it to depress the gas pedal and drive home.

As one of my sons says, "Welcome to Hell. It gets a tad warm."

Welcome to my world. The world of near constant pain, fatigue, no health insurance or money to speak of, and me pushing myself beyond my limits because I want to excel in school.

It's a hard knock life...but I knock right back. I have to. I don't want to be in the same place I was a year ago, when I seriously thought about ending my life because the pain and the depression was almost too much for me to bear. I have a life, a future now, and I have to keep going. No one's going to hand me anything I didn't earn.

Isn't it painfully obvious that SSA didn't think I deserved Disability and SSI? I worked for years to earn the right to claim Disability and SSI in the event I could not work. So when I try to claim what I think is rightfully mine, they shoot me down.

But I gotta keep on keepin' on. It's the only thing I have left.

--MorelaterZ--