Over the weekend, I made out a list of all the changes I've noticed in myself in the last two years, and some of them really concern me. I hope that this doctor actually listens to me and just doesn't blow me (or my concerns about my mental health) off.
On the pain front: the flare I was experiencing at New Years subsided considerably, but I still have pain that Tylenol or Aleve can't help me with. For now, I can't get Celebrex, so I'll have to make do. I only wish I could afford to see a rhuematologist so I can get this under control and live my life as normally as possible. Kinda hard to do when you are exhausted and in pain all the time.
The headaches have been coming more frequently, but that may have to do with my attempt to limit my consumption of caffeine to once a day more than anything else.
It'd be nice to be able to talk about things with someone. Let's hope the appointment on 1/20 is the start of something good and worthwhile.
But, I'm not holding my breath. This is SSA we're talking about here, for cryin' out loud!
In summary: I have pain, no way to treat it because I'm broke and unable to work, and that depresses me more than anyone can imagine (except maybe someone who's going thru the same thing as I am). I hate the way my life is now. I used to be fun, like to have fun, and loved life. Life now, and for the last two years, has been anything but fun.
That list I mentioned at the beginning of this post? I'd post it, but it makes me feel uncomfortable knowing some of the things that are on it scare the shit out of me.
--MorelaterZ--
1 comment:
What words... super, a magnificent idea
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